Stressed Out? De-Stress Yourself!
Wow, things have been HAIRY (and harried!) around Melindaville in the past few weeks. Since the day after New Years, I had to hit the ground running and I have hardly had a chance to catch my breath! Les and I have spent the better part of the last two months traveling from here to there—and traveling is always stressful. In the past two weeks, we have been in Boston, San Francisco, Las Vegas, back to San Francisco, and now I am in Anaheim.
In addition to a busy travel schedule, I have (once again) taken on too many teaching commitments and as a result, I find myself struggling to meet deadlines. Don’t get me wrong—I am most grateful for the opportunity to work and I really do love teaching—it is a passion of mine—truly a calling. Nothing is more rewarding than to see students blossom in my courses and grow to love psychology as I do. I had such wonderful professors when I was an undergraduate student that I feel compelled to pass on that love of learning to my own students. However, juggling seven classes, keeping up with my blog, flitting around the country, and allowing some time to spend with my beloved husband, I am more stressed out than I would like to be or than what's good for me.
I am not alone in my battle against stress—nearly everyone I know—heck, our entire society has more stress in their lives than what is good for them. Stress takes a terrible toll on our both our physical and emotional health: I know exactly how stress affects us—in gory and frightening detail—because this stuff was pumped into my brain cells for an entire undergraduate and graduate education! Physically, it is linked to heart disease, digestive problems, sleep problems, obesity, autoimmune disease and skin conditions such as eczema. Psychologically, stress is central to anxiety and recently, researchers have learned that stress can play a major role in depression. Therefore, it benefits all of us to reduce our level of stress.
So, let’s talk about practical solutions—what we do to reduce the amount of stress in our lives? How can we relieve stress when it does occur? I have several suggestions!
One of the things that influence a person’s stress levels is their support network so strengthening your support network is a great protection against stress. When you have family members or close friends you can count on, the pressures of life will not seem nearly as overwhelming. If you don’t have a support network close by, then it is a good idea to make it a priority to build relationships you can count on. Some great ways to meet people to help form a supportive network is in volunteering, having lunch or dinner with a coworker you’d like to know better, call or email friends you haven’t seen for a while, look on Craigslist to find a tennis partner or a workout buddy, or take a class or join a gym.
While none of us can eliminate stress from our lives altogether, all of us can train ourselves to relax. Some great relaxation techniques include yoga, meditation, and deep breathing: all of these will activate the body’s relaxation response—which is the exact opposite of the stress response. There is an accumulative effect in doing these exercises, also: overtime, these exercises will become even more effective and you will relax even faster. Moreover, they help increase your ability to stay calm to avoid the stress response in the first place!
We all need to take responsibility for our emotional health. Just as it requires time and energy to develop or maintain physical health, it is the same for our emotional well-being. We can all learn to train ourselves to overturn negative thought patterns. When I was first in recovery, I didn’t feel sane, happy, or strong—but one of the best pieces of advice my first counselor told me was to ‘fake it until you make it.’ Even if you don’t quite believe it, when you spot a negative thought entering your mind, overturn it! You have the ability to control your thought patterns: they can be either positive or negative—it’s up to you!
Finally, take some time each day to enjoy your life. Life is a gift—so open it up and enjoy it—and life is also too short to spend it all balled up with stress!
Peace,
Melinda
p.s. I apologize again for their being no podcast—I still haven’t gotten around to getting new recording equipment on the road. It’s stressing me out! 
Categories: Health,Challenges,Happiness,Balance,Transformation and Change,Relaxing
Tags: happiness stress relaxing balance taking care of yourself life health de-stressing
No wonder you've been quiet on your blog! Some things just need to be prioritised and certainly when you've got as much going on as that, I understand.
I'm all for stress reduction, of course. My entire working life has gone from being very stressful, to very relaxed (although I shouldn't say that out loud just in case!) in recent times, and it makes a huge difference in health, energy levels and ability to deal with everything else that goes on.
I hope you are taking it easy Melinda, and finding some balance and calm for yourself. And when you're ready, it will be great to have you back here writing more of your wonderful blog posts. But in the mean time, don't forget to breathe!
Reply to this
Hey Svasti--yes, I have been so busy it's been hard to keep up with the blog--but I am working on a new time management schedule
I'm not surprised that you are unstressed now--you have done a great deal of work on this and you are a yogini!
Thanks so much for your thought and caring--take care my friend--
Melinda
Reply to this
Now I'm totally stressed out because the really well thought-out, clever, and insightful comment I just wrote disappeared into the ether...but I'll get over it...
Reply to this
Hahahahahahaha. I hate when that happens!
Melinda
Reply to this
Stress... I like this word. It seems to have a very special place in our vocabulary. Why is that? Maybe the reason is because without it, people will not learn how to dignify themselves and realize the need to get out of a situation that is absorbing too much mental and physical energy.
"However, juggling seven classes, keeping up with my blog, flitting around the country, and allowing some time to spend with my beloved husband, I am more stressed out than I would like to be or than what's good for me."
There's always a time to take it easy, Melinda. =)
Reply to this
You know, I think you are right--there's always time to take it easy and after this insane time of teaching too many classes, I am really vowing to never do this to myself again! I still have trouble saying 'no' to people when they need a favor, which is why I am teaching so much right now. My Dept. Chair was in a spot and I volunteered to help out.
There also needs to be time to stop and smell the flowers . . .
Thanks so much for stopping by.
Reply to this
Hello Hello!!
Take a break...have a cookie ^_^
Yes. I know what you mean, by taking up way too much than you can actually handle, but struggling putting things aside. I have a serious case of this going on at the moment -_-'. And finding a balance in this all, isn't easy and you probably won't get a total balance, but you can strive to it
So here's a toast... *raises a piece of toast...sorry no champagne early in the morning for me*...to finding more of a balance in things you want to do in life, knowing when to stop because our body & mind says we have to and just enjoying life because you only got one!
Take care Melinda!
Ciao!
Reply to this
Hey TJ!
How in the world did you become so wise at such a young age? I truly wish I would have had some of your wisdom when I was in my youth (but I have a hard head and it takes a lot for me to figure things out--hahaha). You have an old soul but a young spirit, TJ--and imo, that's an amazing combination.
Thanks for the toast! I like cinnamon the best!
Melinda
Reply to this
Awww Melinda!! I'm truly humbled by your kind words! Thanks so much! I honestly don't know what else to say ^_^.
Woohoo! Glad you liked the toast! Oh I would love to have some cinnamon cookies/toast/biscuits right now!
Ciao!!
Reply to this
I meant every word, TJ! Truly.
When we finally meet--either here in the US or in Amsterdam--we are going to share some cinnamon biscuits! YUM!
Melinda
Reply to this
I'm impressed that with as much stress as you have going on in your life right now you would create such an encouraging post for others.
Thanks for the heads-up and positivity!
Reply to this
Hey Lydia,
I am glad to hear it wasn't anything more serious! I also get dermatitis when I am stressed out. I find the more relaxation techniques I use, the better I feel, both physically and mentally. I am glad to hear my post was a bit helpful!
Thanks for stopping by--
Melinda
Reply to this
Dear sister, I'm impressed to hear that inspite of such a busy life you still take psychology as a passion and are still working hard to trasfer your knowledge and love of psychology to your students.
May God provide you more oppertunities of serving humanity and also may He make your life easy and full of peace and success for you.
Ameen!
Peace to you too!
Ibn Hanif
Reply to this
My dear friend, Ibn Hanif--
As always, I so appreciate your thoughts, prayers, and kind words. I have been so lucky to have been given a rebirth in this life that I do feel it is my honor (and responsibility) to pass that along to others whenever possible. I know that you feel the same way too.
Take care,
Melinda
Reply to this
Stress can really take its toll, but in a way, at times, it also gives a really good feeling ... in the sense that it feels nice to be preoccupied in many things and doing something that we really enjoy ...
My life has taken a complete turnover in the past few months. There are so many things to do and the stress keeps on mounting. But, in the end it gives me a real satisfaction that I'm involved in things that I completely love to do.
Yeah, at times it becomes tiring and mentally taxing, but on the whole it also gives an immense level of satisfaction.
But, yes measures have to be taken to keep stress at certain limits and having a good social support is obviously one way to do it.
As always, a good post to read.
Reply to this
Saif,
There are definitely some kinds of positive stress! Working hard in a career you are passionate, such as you are, is one example. Also, preparing for marriage is exciting and wonderful--but also stressful. Whether stress if positive or negative, the effects of the stress hormones are the same -- so it is always important to take care of our stress--even when it is good!
Thank you so much for stopping by and sharing your views--I know I appreciated this and I am certain my readers will too!
Melinda
Reply to this
Fortunately, I'm a very low stress person and always have been. Part temperament, part outlook on life, I guess. These days my biggest stress is doing that one post every month-which every month I put off longer due to congenital laziness and procrastination. Hope you find more time for just yourself soon, but at least you have the satisfaction of being productive and doing something you truly love.
Reply to this
NP,
LOL--I am not at all surprised that you are not a stressed out person--everything about you definitely suggests otherwise (and how lucky you are!).
I think we all suffer from congenital laziness and procrastination--so don't feel bad!
Melinda
Reply to this